The best stuff happens with Greeks. An undersea robot has discovered a Greek ship from 350 BC containing ceramic jars of olive oil, wine and whatever else Greek ships carried back then. Imagine that advertising slogan: "We deliver in six weeks or it's free!" We know that buried ship isn't carrying the head of Medusa because Teri Hatcher is wearing it on her neck:



And to add to the goodness that is Greece, archeologists have discovered a huge ancient tomb from 400 BC. I can't think of a single thing that excites me more than archeological ruins in Greece. Except maybe Cheez-Doodles. We all know how much those excite me.

Back to the US and shipping, I got Netflix in 1999 because I thought it was a good idea. And they were good to early customers. But I dropped them two years ago because they are scamming you with their shipping policies. Told ya.

If you want to ship your children to Hong Kong Disneyland, I discourage you from simply throwing them over the fences and into the park. No matter how badly you may want to.

Back to our regularly scheduled humor later today. Meanwhile, take comfort in the knowledge that Heidi Klum will not be grabbing your butt again this year.